Busy Ines
A breezy blog about serious topics that might concern one person or the whole universe. Short pieces to be enjoyed with your morning coffee or evening vodka, which will make you reflect on your life for at least one minute.
 
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Busy’s easygoing, flirty, lazy alter ego. Writes whenever she feels inspired by any kind of thing, thought or theme. Mixes fiction with reality, writes in verse or prose, likes to stay passively alert.

Impressions
The space for book and film reviews, impressions from interesting events, interviews and meaningful interactions with exuberant people. 

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Breaking Habits, Part I

11/01/2013

There are things that exert a morbid fascination in people, the sort that makes you obsess about something even if you know that you can perfectly go on living without it. A horror scene in an acclaimed movie, for instance, attracts such attention from a horror-hating viewer. Other objects of fixation include new fashion trends that have to be reproduced in ugly polyester, iPhone 5, tabloids or synchronized swimming (could not take my eyes off it during the Olympics).

In my humble opinion, there is nothing worse than bestselling over-hyped books. The moment the press avalanche starts rolling, my eyes start rolling too. Wherever you go, people talk about IT; you open a magazine and voilà!, IT is staring at you. You think that after making millions the author will buy a place on the moon and transfer there, but you are wrong: there is sequel 1, sequel 2 and the prequel of the prequel. Then, IT (plus prequels/sequels) is made into a life-long movie, which inspires a fashion and cosmetics line, boy-group songs, baby names etc. My problem is that the more people talk about a book that I know I will not like (not interested in themes or style), the more I may obsess about it. I cannot just let IT be the love object of other thousands of humans, reminding me of the time when everyone at school was talking about Beverly Hills 90210 that I was not allowed to watch.  Furthermore, I want to be open about different tastes in entertainment.

One day for example I opened a newspaper website asking if The Da Vinci Code was based on a real story. People were commenting that they wanted to be symbologists when they grew up. I ignored the information but over the summer The Code became an unignorable big hit. Da Vinci, that mischievous lad! What had he done? I had to know. I read the book, which was kind of entertaining but, frankly, I did not care more about that code after the last page. It was not the kind of book that attracts me. It was pure social pressure. Of course Hollywood used its own code to make it into a very boring movie.  Later, after the migraines that the likes of Coelho gave me, I decided to train myself not to fall victim to the hit industry. I had to be more selective, for there are of course a few bestsellers that I like. Thus, in the last years I survived sadomasochists, aliens, alpha mothers, second lives and vampires. Until now.

Sitting in one of the cinemas one cold winter night of last year, they played the Twilight trailer (Breaking Dawn, Part II, or so). At the sight of the ridiculously well-formed sixpack of the werewolf guy, the young men sitting near me laughed nervously. Then the vampire guy gave the vampire girl a cheesy smile and everyone laughed. It was clear to me that I was not surrounded by Twi-hards. Instead of reassuring me in my choice not to follow the trend, the laughs planted in me a burning desire to watch Breaking Dawn. Back home I read about Bella and Edward. Bella was a vampire now and they were together forever and had a kid but somehow the child was cursed and there was a vampire fight in the end. Jacob, the werewolf, who in the real world could have had any teenage girl, was apparently bound to the child in the film. Suddenly, I had to know why. Curiouser and curiouser!

So, I started the movie, prepared for a bloody hell. First, there were all the pretty vampires in a house between snowy mountains (where are they, in Alaska?) who talked in a painfully slow manner with their pale lips like they were going to wake someone. Bella looked constipated as her face was checking for her child, who had been imprinted by the werewolf. Reading the Twilight Wiki I learned that when werewolves imprint someone, they are his/her slaves till death do them part, but I still do not know what imprinting implies in this case. Did he infect the little girl with love bacteria? The point is the baby’s fate was sealed. She was to be married to a much older (hairy?) guy.

Bella experiences that vampires have heightened senses (they can see a spider dining on a fly!) and that they do not get tired. Hear me? Their activities never ever tire them. They run extremely fast but interestingly enough Bella needs a car when she visits the neighbours.  She and Edward are very much in love even considering the fact that they will literally be together forever and I observe that the other vampire couples are also very much attached to one another. Their – otherwise empty- looks are full of love when they turn their heads to their respective partners. For a full hour I have to watch them watching Bella loving Edward, Edward loving the child with the unfortunate name Renesmee, then Bella loving the child and the child loving them all back, accompanied by sugary music. I have the impression that the actors sneer sheepishly in a few moments, mocking the Holy Trinity.

The bliss is shattered by the notice that the bad, bad, Volturi vampires want to kill the child because Renesmee is different (I do not suppose you want details here). The Volturi are ancient Italian aristocrats loving the old social order, for blood’s sake! They never look amused, except when they can torture or kill someone, and they wear long robes, reminding me of The Da Vinci Code. I learn that cracking their neck open, detaching the head from the body and burning what is left is the method of killing vampires. Murdering the undead has apparently been modernised in the last years. The touchdown is on a snowy field among wuthering heights. A row of Volturi faces a smaller row of Bellward and friends, including huge wolves. The main Volturo mispronounces the word "magnifico”. The fight begins. It is not a nice sight. Like in Henry VIII’s court, a considerate number of decapitations take place. The good thing is that they are bloodless due to the empty-vesseled vampires. The fight "forest animals vs. naughty witch” in Snow White is livelier than this head-plucking event. In the end it is not even a real fight, but just a vision. So, world peace restored, Renesmee back in being loved by her annoying parents.

It was again interesting to see what presently moves millions of people. Vampires have gone soft. They live among us and reproduce. I would like to know how many Renesmees have started pre-school this year. I will not read and certainly not watch 50 Shades of Grey, although I did not know that grey was so versatile (alternative: 50 Shades of Chicken).  When is the movie anyways?

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