Many foreigners have heard about it before visiting our beautiful city of Vienna, others might have had the pleasure of experiencing it during their stay: the so-called Viennese charm. In other cities of the world people would call this particular type of behaviour "nonchalant unfriendliness and proud of it”. We call it charm. Few residents of Vienna would be surprised, if the waiter in a (pretty expensive) café growls at them and looks absolutely not amused when he brings the boiled egg and Würstel, like it’s the customer’s fault that they have to carry around boiled meat in phallic shapes. Yes, we’re pretty relaxed about this and we also don’t make a fuss in case a dish has not reached the perfect enjoyment temperature or if the bread roll sticks in our throat because it’s a bit too dry. You don’t want the waiter to stare at you like that grandma who survived WWII. And, please, don’t mention to them how the friendly faces at Starbucks will put all their energy into making the ‘the perfect no-ice, lactose-free, special-espresso-bean, extra-foam iced café latte’. Actually, don’t mention this to anyone in Vienna.  Should the coffee be this complex, it better have alcohol in it. 

So, we obediently suck the esprit charmant in bars, restaurants, administrative offices or public transportation. It ceases to be fun, though, when it transcends to doctors. There’s a good number of doctors (including dentists) in Vienna, who lack the intelligence and sensitivity to understand that consulting patients about their health issues is not the same thing as burning an omelette. I’m sure that the number of docs who are competent at their subject painfully deviates from the number of those that can convey this wisdom in an appropriate way to their patients. I alone have met doctors who were superbly patronising or not able to listen or worked like machines and treated their patients like car parts in a factory. Some would have liked to start a treatment without any explanation; others gave lengthy unsolicited explanations. There has been the occasional psychopath, who yelled (!) at me for no good reason and one sadist, who obviously loved to deliver bad news. I am a friendly person who even has an understanding of a doctor’s stressful work, but if this is too subjective to support my thesis: I talk a lot about this issue with my friends, family and people with whom I have shared some of these unpleasant experiences. Including other doctors, who usually agree that the doctor-patient communication in Vienna needs improvement.   

I know that doctors are humans too. They have their good and bad days. They have to deal with dolor-in-anum patients. They bravely endure long working hours in hospitals. Yes, yes, and yes, but nobody forced them to take on this job, which comes with a responsibility that I admire. The patient is in a (very) vulnerable position and the doctor is in an absolute power position. Many doctors choose to forget this. Even if I leave out the hospitals, there is a tendency among Dr. med.s here to rather distance themselves from the basic human needs of the patient, which include a professional, polite voice, especially when delivering the dramatic climax of crappy news. I have been to many doctors in Vienna, as I’ve also helped and accompanied family and friends many, many times.  When I go to a new one, I’m rather surprised to find a friendly face than the other way round. Basic nice. No hug or tea needed.  

There are of course wonderful doctors in Vienna. I would cry, if those I have found now, after years of experimenting with others, would move away. There is room for improvement for many others and I hope that more doctors will be offered supervision, in case they feel overworked. Not everyone can handle being a doctor without borders. Regarding those who choose to be unfriendly: Please put a sign on your office door: "Beware of the doc”.